It’s football season dudes! I can’t wait to break out my pigball and start throwing some touchdowns. I’m so glad it’s back. The break feels like it gets longer every year. I almost had to talk to my girlfriend.

Oh, random side note, I’m finally going to do it. This year I am finally starting my petition to change the name of football to “Hide the Egg” which if you think about it, makes much more sense then “football”, but I digress…

Ok bros. We meet at fountain park at 3pm.  DO NOT BE LATE.
Just remember, our team uniform is short shorts and no top. We’re the SKINZ. We play to win. We’re manly men. No front. Make sure you study our plays and be ready to dominate. Jake, make sure you fake left in the “Dangle Switch” and Justin, you stay out of my fuckin way on the “Poppin’ Fresh”.  If you’re all up in my nuts one more time, I will kick your ass…back at my place…in the shower. Just remember, I call permanent quarter back.  I’m the hero.  Plus, the view is just too awesome.

There will be mandatory group showers at my place after the game.  I have no towels so it’s all gonna have to be air dry. So leave it all out on the field tomorrow guys. We’ll be able to get plenty clean after. I also have plenty of moisture and oils if you need them from your super muscly game.

Also, We can practice tackling while we wait for our wet bodies to dry.  Might do us some good to do runs and tackles without constricting uniforms. All super limber and stretched out and stuff, you know?  I also give a pretty fucking good muscle massage if you need it.  Just ask.

God it feels good to be on the team again.

GO TEAM

- Team Captain Rob Bigfield

(-Joey)